Posted in Slightly Wrong Poetry

The Brussels Sequence

My copywriting friends, Paul Holder and Lara Groves, and I were bored one Christmas lunchtime so we came up with an important contribution to haiku culture. Lara hates Brussels sprouts. Can you guess which is the verse she wrote?
Come, friends, and let us
Praise the sprout in all its forms.
Boiled. That’s it, really.

What about breakfast?
Little balls quick fried with spuds:
Bubble and sprout squeak.

Girdle the little
Green with fine shortcrust pastry;
Lo! Sprout Wellington.

Put the kettle on
Dried balls, water to the line,
Pot Sprout for students.

Sin, scraped from the tongue,
Bitterness inspires puke.
Sprout, you win again.

Who would have thought a
Tiny cabbage engenders
Such discordant views?


Copywriter. Poet. Lyricist.

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